Today

I don't know if I'll ever feel as deeply 

and strongly for someone as I did for you. 

You had me at, "is your hair hungry?" 

And at every line you drew. 

I want you to know 

that this is not for show.

It's how my life has changed, 

since you ended our friendship

 like a hanger to be hanged.

He kissed me today. 

By the river, on the bank.

He asked me first 

And I saw his thirst 

But after you 

I hate that it's true 

But I rarely do refuse.

I remember I saw that exact same thirst 

once before in your eyes 

as they cursed 

the feeling there inside of you 

to wait at least until month three

To even dare kiss me; 

I loved your chivalry. 

I don't know how you did it— 

how you wonderfully won over me.

I don't even think you knew how willingly 

I gave my heart over to you. 

For once upon a zucchini gift 

on my deck as only you would do, 

I simply and whole-heart-edly just knew. 

Now I give my body and my opinion.

And I neither do not mind nor do. 

The only thing that kills me now 

is that no matter who I choose,

not one of them will ever be 

the same as you— for they are them—

and you refuse.